How to be unforgettable in 3 steps!

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la-habana-su-genteDeep down we all have that longing for permanence, we would love to be remembered and to leave a legacy and of course we all would like to be remembered for the good things that we did. Let’s be honest, doesn’t that teenage question come back to haunt you from time to time? Yeah the one that, before reaching twenty, tortured you and created stress, anxiety and even drove you nuts, the question of what is my life about? What is the purpose of being here? What justifies my existence and my daily efforts?

I believe the reason it comes back to haunt you is because may be you have been evading the answer. As we grow we find things that seem to answer the question and we adopt them: “it is about having a family and about providing the best for them”, “it is about creating a successful and rewarding professional career”, “it is about being a mother and making sure that my children grow up to good and successful adults”,  “it is about taking care of my parents and ensuring they have a good life for the remainder of their time”, “it is about making this organization grow and becoming a great thing”.

May be it is about being successful and happy, happy and successful; at the end the definition of happiness is as subjective as there are people breathing on earth.

I don’t know if this will help you answer the question but I believe there are 3 easy steps to become unforgettable.

  1. Understand that you are an entertainer. Do you want to be remembered? Be funny, everybody likes and remembers a person that makes them laugh. It doesn’t mean that you have the best jokes, but it means that you have such a fresh attitude for life and enjoy every moment with a genuine quest for fun, for laughter. Have and make others have an enjoyable moment. It is not a secret that the “entertainers” are the most attractive people possessing an enviable energy that we want to keep close and that we will remember.
  2. Be a contributor. Do you remember those who have been key contributors to your life? Of course you do, they might have helped with money in tough times, with their time when you needed help, with their knowledge or expertise, with their advise or with their concern and understanding. They imprinted a lasting memory in your mind by contributing to your life, the same way you imprint an undeletable memory when you contribute to somebody’s life. And yes life is a transaction, the more you give, the more you get, but sometimes we are so concerned with our own well being, so fearful to survive or live at the level that we want that we forget this rule. Contributors are not only always remembered; at the end they are the ones that receive more.
  3. Be sensitive. We like and respect those who care, and we remember when we had problems and a good friend or relative shared our pain, his suffering was expressed in ideas, advice, may be tears, a helping hand trying to relieve the pain we were in. And as we go through our pains and lows in life we will always remember those who lend just sensitive time through holding our hand, giving us a hug or a shoulder to cry for a while.

If you want to be unforgettable for your teacher, for your kids, for your partner, for your company, for that person you are trying to conquer, for your friends; I am sure this 3-step formula will help your cause.

Remember you are an entertainer, laugh and make laugh; you are a contributor give as much as you can; and be sensitive, always have time for compassion, a genuine desire for other’s happiness.

If your daily mantra is: I am going to have a good time for myself and others, I am going to be a top contributor today and I will be compassionate; I believe you might be answering the question what is my life about? What is the purpose of being here? And if not, at least you will have a heck of a good time while you find the answer.

Guillermo Mendoza guillermo@speakerforsuccess.com (832)334-3583

“Transforming organizations by energizing your people and getting results.”

Guillermo’s authentic style and insight engages audiences to make the changes necessary to create transformations in their organizations and lives.

Available for international engagements in: English, Spanish or Portuguese.

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2 Key Steps to Manage Your Predicaments

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a-better-life-654x3791I am a firm believer of goals, plans and actions, I am convinced that if I have not gotten something in life, it is because I have not had the discipline to implement a good plan to get it, I think that is empowering. But I also recognize that sometimes some of our energy gets lost on trying to change something that will not change.

 

We have so many popular phrases or sayings to help us accept things and be complacent, like: “Everything is as it should be”, or “Things happen for a reason”, or “It is God’s will”. I am not discarding any of these; actually I think all of them are pretty valid and true.

 

Where I believe we fail is when we do not have a firm position, of either accepting it or fighting it, switching back and forth between I will do something and there is nothing to do will not help your cause. When we face challenges or difficult situations in our life we need to start handling them with a clear and definite assessment: Can this be changed? Can I do something about it?

 

Instead of asking (and answering those questions) sometimes we start the useless dance between frustration, anxiety and impotence; and worriedness, sadness and low energy action. But the better formula to solve your predicaments is to follow, with firm conviction, these 2 elements: acceptance and action.

 

Can this be changed? If the answer is no then acceptance is your word: “Everything is as it should be”, or “Things happen for a reason”, or “It is God’s will”, stop fighting the situation and accept that it is what it is.  Now you are not off the hook, your acceptance action is to start thinking if you want to stay in that unchangeable situation or what things you can do in the future to be able to answer “Yes, it can be changed”, only then will you be able to stop acceptance and move to the next question.

 

Can I do something about it? If the answer is no, same situation, acceptance is your word and exactly the same process applies, your acceptance action is to start thinking on what are the things that you can change in yourself to be able to do something about it?, only when you can answer “Yes, I can do something about it” you are ready for real action. If it can change and if you can change it, then you now have all of the power, no more acceptance, it is about goal, plan and disciplined execution.

 

Now this is the tricky part, our present moment, our changing reality is never a standing still moment, think about it, the second you are living your present it becomes the past and your next second arrives from the future with your new present, in a blink of an eye.

 

Top performers, leaders, achievers, champions, enlightened fulfilled beings are those that manage to split every second of their precious moments in life in 2 parts: the present moment where they accept everything is as it should be, and the present moment where assessing the situation they take action to think, talk or act with whatever is needed to create better futures.

 

May be the skill to split a second is going to take you some time, but a good beginning is to start splitting your challenges, problems, predicaments in two parts: acceptance and action.

 

“Transforming organizations by energizing your people and getting results.”

Guillermo Mendoza is a business development strategist, speaker and writer. He is passionate about sharing the tools and experiences that he has helping executive leaders and their teams by creating consciousness, developing leadership and getting results.

Available for international engagements in: English, Spanish or Portuguese.

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How to let go of fear of new beginnings?

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recomenzarEvery time we start a new project we have the excitement of what it implies: new challenges, new experiences, new horizons; but we also have the anxiety that stems from being afraid of the unknown, success, uncertainty and fear of failure.

 

There is a natural reaction in the mind to travel to the future and imagine everything that this new adventure will give us if we are successful, maybe financial benefits, maybe improved relationships, maybe a sense of accomplishment, maybe a new physical look, or the peace that comes from solving a problem or reaching a goal.

 

This reaction takes us to focus more on the things that we are missing and that in theory when we accomplish this new project we will get.

 

What we do not always think about in these cases is what we already have, what we already are. Our eagerness of continuous improvement or growth takes us to sometimes focus too much on what is coming and not giving time to review what already happened.

 

Great philosophers and mystical teachers have declared that we are already perfect, that things are already as they should be and that the only thing we are missing is an understanding of these concepts. Without attempting to play philosopher with these concepts, I believe we always want and should improve, I think it is unavoidable that our mind travels to the future and imagines things and thoughts of a better life in one way or other. But I also think it is important to understand that by definition improvement is to take something from one state to another, but that does not imply that the current state is bad.

 

In Coaching we say that a Coach helps a person to find a better version of him or her, we do not say to find a good version implying that the current one is bad. Actually the opposite is happening, more and more Executive and Life Coaching are focusing on improving someone that is already pretty good.

 

It is important to use this concept and realize that when we start new projects even when the goal is improvement (I do not think anybody starts a project to be worse at something); it is very important to remember that we are already ok, that our current situation whatever it is, is a privileged one because we have a life to work with and achieve what we want, because we have roots and family that with all its virtues and defects is a part of us and because every day no matter where we are, we are already here with plenty to be grateful for.

 

The list is endless, from basic things that we take for granted like energy and water or clothing and meals that are not that granted for many people, to the privilege of education, reading, and personal growth. And lets not forget the most important, our relationships with all the people that we love and that love us back or with those that we consider distant but help us or give us a chance to help.

 

A fast review of the past gives you all the elements to realize how fortunate you are and how even the worse things in your life have given you the greatest learning and how today your strengths come from those sufferings.

 

When I reflect on all of this I cannot avoid having a profound gratitude for what I already have and for what I already am, regardless of what I am going to do or be.

 

Every day we are creating a new version of ourselves, every day we are a different person, every day our projects move us forward, but lets not forget where we are already.

 

If you achieve a true satisfaction in what you already have and are, I believe you will be getting one of the best ingredients to achieve something new: the security that you are already good and the confidence that you can be better. With this ingredient there are no failures, no fears because whatever happens with the project you have the awareness that it is all about improving something that is already good: you.

 

All anxiety, all uncertainty and all fear that implies starting something will diminish when you internalize the satisfaction of knowing you are lucky here and now.

 

My best wishes for your 2014 projects and as you start them remember: “You are ok, you are already lucky with what you have and what you are, gratitude and satisfaction are your starting point”

 

“Transforming organizations by energizing your people and getting results.”

Guillermo Mendoza is a business development strategist, speaker and writer. He is passionate about sharing the tools and experiences that he has helping executive leaders and their teams by creating consciousness, developing leadership and getting results.

Available for international engagements in: English, Spanish or Portuguese.

Guillermo Mendoza guillermo@icscoaching.com (832)334-3583

 

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How to be successful in 2014!

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My name is Guillermo Mendoza and I am the speaker for success, I dubbed myself that way because my vision is to help as many people as I can to succeed. As most things success is subjective and it is different for each person, but whether you want success in your career, relationships, job, business, child raising or love, it is always about having that nice feeling of accomplishment and self fulfillment, that grin on your face silently congratulating yourself for how good you are, how success decided to be a part of you.

We all have our success formulas, our definition of what works and what does not, and they are engrained as part of our opinions, thoughts and belief system, and wrongly sometimes we believe that by using our “secret weapon” we will be ahead of others and achieve that success. The irony is that it is precisely the opposite that creates more success. Those who became an open book and share their tricks helping others are seen as the experts, the gurus, the ones that know how to tackle a specific problem and help others with success by coaching, counseling, mentoring, speaking, writing; by being available and making their knowledge available.

I cannot think of a more successful way to start the year than to establish our success goals with the discipline in mind of what it would take to become a success. Any new endeavor will require resources of time, may be money, effort and of course a perseverant attitude to reach success. But for success to happen, a good strategy is required and my proposal for your 2014 strategy is to be available and make your knowledge available.

We all have our tricks, our “secret weapons”, and our proven techniques that for this or that have given us success in the past. Review what you did, what you said, what you thought when you were being successful and share it; help others to succeed and by a weird chain reaction you will become more successful.

I consider it selfish not to share our success formulas and selfishness is not a good way to start the New Year don’t you think? Embrace the art of sharing your knowledge and the even better art of sharing your help, your encouragement, and your love; and believe me life will pay you back by sharing success with you.

“Transforming organizations by energizing your people and getting results.”

Guillermo Mendoza is a business development strategist, speaker and writer. He is passionate about sharing the tools and experiences that he has helping executive leaders and their teams by creating consciousness, developing leadership and getting results.

Available for international engagements in: English, Spanish or Portuguese.

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5 Things To Beat The Fear Of Public Speaking (The Short Version)