How to let go of fear of new beginnings?

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recomenzarEvery time we start a new project we have the excitement of what it implies: new challenges, new experiences, new horizons; but we also have the anxiety that stems from being afraid of the unknown, success, uncertainty and fear of failure.

 

There is a natural reaction in the mind to travel to the future and imagine everything that this new adventure will give us if we are successful, maybe financial benefits, maybe improved relationships, maybe a sense of accomplishment, maybe a new physical look, or the peace that comes from solving a problem or reaching a goal.

 

This reaction takes us to focus more on the things that we are missing and that in theory when we accomplish this new project we will get.

 

What we do not always think about in these cases is what we already have, what we already are. Our eagerness of continuous improvement or growth takes us to sometimes focus too much on what is coming and not giving time to review what already happened.

 

Great philosophers and mystical teachers have declared that we are already perfect, that things are already as they should be and that the only thing we are missing is an understanding of these concepts. Without attempting to play philosopher with these concepts, I believe we always want and should improve, I think it is unavoidable that our mind travels to the future and imagines things and thoughts of a better life in one way or other. But I also think it is important to understand that by definition improvement is to take something from one state to another, but that does not imply that the current state is bad.

 

In Coaching we say that a Coach helps a person to find a better version of him or her, we do not say to find a good version implying that the current one is bad. Actually the opposite is happening, more and more Executive and Life Coaching are focusing on improving someone that is already pretty good.

 

It is important to use this concept and realize that when we start new projects even when the goal is improvement (I do not think anybody starts a project to be worse at something); it is very important to remember that we are already ok, that our current situation whatever it is, is a privileged one because we have a life to work with and achieve what we want, because we have roots and family that with all its virtues and defects is a part of us and because every day no matter where we are, we are already here with plenty to be grateful for.

 

The list is endless, from basic things that we take for granted like energy and water or clothing and meals that are not that granted for many people, to the privilege of education, reading, and personal growth. And lets not forget the most important, our relationships with all the people that we love and that love us back or with those that we consider distant but help us or give us a chance to help.

 

A fast review of the past gives you all the elements to realize how fortunate you are and how even the worse things in your life have given you the greatest learning and how today your strengths come from those sufferings.

 

When I reflect on all of this I cannot avoid having a profound gratitude for what I already have and for what I already am, regardless of what I am going to do or be.

 

Every day we are creating a new version of ourselves, every day we are a different person, every day our projects move us forward, but lets not forget where we are already.

 

If you achieve a true satisfaction in what you already have and are, I believe you will be getting one of the best ingredients to achieve something new: the security that you are already good and the confidence that you can be better. With this ingredient there are no failures, no fears because whatever happens with the project you have the awareness that it is all about improving something that is already good: you.

 

All anxiety, all uncertainty and all fear that implies starting something will diminish when you internalize the satisfaction of knowing you are lucky here and now.

 

My best wishes for your 2014 projects and as you start them remember: “You are ok, you are already lucky with what you have and what you are, gratitude and satisfaction are your starting point”

 

“Transforming organizations by energizing your people and getting results.”

Guillermo Mendoza is a business development strategist, speaker and writer. He is passionate about sharing the tools and experiences that he has helping executive leaders and their teams by creating consciousness, developing leadership and getting results.

Available for international engagements in: English, Spanish or Portuguese.

Guillermo Mendoza guillermo@icscoaching.com (832)334-3583

 

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